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Archive for the ‘love’ Category

alone at night, hard bed, neighbors scream next door

paper-thin, garage-sale sheets flutter from a shaky fan

street lights permeate broken blinds and illuminate a smoky room

pills and warm beer numb the pain and prevent the tears

swollen feet, rotten teeth, stiff fingers, aching back

selling lottery tickets and cheap gas at a ten-hour shift

paycheck to paycheck, bologna sandwiches, fried burrito shirts

anyone, no one wonders where it all went

unrealized dreams, youth breezed by, life advanced

mistakes begat mistakes, finishing last on life’s ladder

forgotten loves, child support, where are they now

my god, my god, why have you forgotten me

regret and sorrow is all i deserve

regret and sorrow is all i own

i don’t want to make the light of day

a life, a life, a life that finished last

promise, sacrifice, messiah, love

redemption, forgiveness, risen glory

for a soul, a soul…

a soul to finish first

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another night without talking

backs simply gawking

on the edge of balking

intent on stalling

loves withdrawing

recalling the days I loved u

drawing on gray november hue

mumbling out of the blue

pausing becomes past due

whispering I love you

our time quickly dying

no matter if I’m trying

fighting, denying, crying

I know you’re just surviving

a broken soul tiring

I miss you smiling

I set you free

of you

that was me

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2014-07-29 19.18.24

Love. So much has been written, sung, created, joined, saved, married, and born… a universe generated from our God’s love, LOVE so powerful, that, from that love, life burst forth from nothing. God loved life beyond our comprehension that somehow, a universe grew from that love. In that split second of the big bang our souls grabbed ahold of a teeny, tiny piece of that love, and we have been happy sad laughing crying jumping crawling all at the same time, and this, THIS moves this fragile life of ours. You feel it swell in your chest that you lose your breath and your stomach quivers. You digest it to the point of exhaustion and your legs are weak. (more…)

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there’s my mom, sittin’ up front, cryin’, carryin’ on

in er blue dress, the one she got for my gradeation

the lace ’round the collar is tore, but that’s my fault

seein’ how she cried, when i fell, cause i was plastered

didn’t even have it in my hand yet, the deploma that is

everyone laughed…but not my mom, she gets angry (more…)

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The man, motionless, sagging as a weathered piece of wallpaper –
tearing from the top, hangs, hangs, hangs
from the blood-stained frame worn smooth from daily crucifixions.
With knees bent awkwardly to the left and arms outstretched and nailed to wood,
his chin rests upon his bloody chest as the body protrudes from the cross.
Dark, blood-stained eyes stare out upon a red-washed landscape,
scanning the world full of people, near and off in the distance, now and lives to come;
his breathing is labored, each exhale painful from bruised ribs
each inhale impossible from the weight of his limp body;
the man struggles, licks his parched lips and speaks…

Father… forgive them… for they… for they… do not know… what they do…

they hurt they do not know they do not comprehend
i love them you love them let me bear their pain their suffering
i beg you please take all their pain and place upon me I will endure
all who will hurt put their pain on me all their tragedies heartaches sufferings illnesses
the years will come and go but they will not change they will always be scared
IT HURTS   IT HURTS   IT     HURTS
my body is weak take away the hurt
i am SCARED
i am so afraid of dying father
so scared
i feel alone
will they ever understand why
will they
answer me
i just want them to love you
i just want them to love you
i just want them to know who i am
who i am who i am know who i am
to know how much you love them

The swell of bystanders murmuring, pointing, and snickering, at the man
relish in the festivities of Roman ringleaders as they gamble for his clothing.
But, as hours float away and the sun scorches the ground, the crowd, the man –
uninterested spectators wander away to tend to more pressing affairs.

forgive me if I have failed as i gave all I had
you lied
i hurt i am dying father FATHER F A T H EERRR

The man struggles to lift his head heavenward and screams
in a broken voice that could have been yelled by an eighty-year-old smoker.

My God… My God… why… Why! Why have you forsaken me!

no
no
no no  no    no         no      father i feel you here beside me
holding me loving me comforting me revealing to me let your will be done
I am terrified I must die I will carry their load suffer their sins
I will pay their debt let your will be done I love them you love them
I give all that I am all that I will be all that love offers
Let my suffering   my    suffering be their glory

Warm moist air pushes rain heavy clouds across the sky
casting the area into a dull lifeless masterpiece of gray.
The day has drifted into eternity.
With a smile on his lips and glimmer in his eyes
the Messiah, the Christ, the Savior lifts his head
forgive them for they do not know what they do – and speaks

Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.

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